Moto

"She doesn't like me," said Deborah.

"How do you know it's a she?"

"Trust me, it's a she."

As we approached Moto to use the "dinner for two" gift certificate that my Triumph had won for us as "People's Choice" at the motorcycle show a couple of weeks ago, the bike conked out. I'd been riding solo all day without a problem, and even after picking Deborah up and riding double, it seemed to be purring nicely. But just outside the restaurant, it stalled and wouldn't start again. I pushed it into a suitable parking spot and trusted it would restart after dinner.

You can excuse an unrestored 39 year old motorcycle for being finicky, and, indeed, it wasn't designed for two person cruising to begin with, but because it will run 200 trouble free miles in a single day when I'm riding solo and barely made it five with Deborah on back, she's convinced that the bike is jealous of her.

"I don't know why," she said. "I'm always nice to her."

"Women," I shrugged. "You know how it is."

Deborah slapped me across my arm, and we went inside to eat.

The gift certificate was worth up to eighty dollars, but since neither one of us was drinking, it was impossible to hit the limit. Appetizers, entrees, and dessert left us thirty dollars shy. Alcohol would've easily topped it up, but since I was riding the bike, I didn't want to start, and Deborah tries not to drink at all these days.

Earlier in the summer, Deborah and I had planned to take a trip to Toronto to visit Raymi and her boyfriend. But when they heard we wouldn't be getting soused every night, we were promptly uninvited. "What's the point?" I think they said, before adding, "Only kidding."

Either way, dinner was nice without the free drinks.

Speaking of free drinks, the second gift certificate I won at the motorcycle show was for a free case of beer. When I mentioned it to a "recovering alcoholic" friend of mine who has been sober for over ten years, he said, "Get it!"

"I will," I said. "Eventually. Maybe we'll throw a party or something."

"Get it now," he said. "Before you forget."

There was a short, slightly uncomfortable pause.

"Sorry," he said. "That's still how I think.”